Just keep swimming

It is amazing the roller coaster that one can go on from day to day in life. This week did not start out so good for me, if we are talking calendar week here. Sunday I was sad. Just plain sad. There was no real reason, explanation or event that set it off. I woke up that way, stayed that way as I got ready for work, drove to work, and spent the next 12 hours there. Monday morning when I came home I decided it was best to just sleep like normal and not to try to get up any earlier just because it was my day off. So I did just that, got 6 hours of sleep, did a quick run of the vacuum, made a nice dinner and then enjoyed a movie with my husband. Oh let me back up just a minute, I’d had something positive happen on Friday, but silly me I didn’t let that carry me through all weekend hence the sadness on Sunday! Anyhow, back to Monday….after enjoying a nice evening I got to go to bed at the same time as my husband and by some miracle I slept all night and got another 6 hours of sleep! That is unheard of recently for me. Tuesday morning I woke up feeling so refreshed, and I had an amazing day. I utilized some skills I’m learning and tracked my day in a notebook. The point of this exercise is to see where you are wasting time and learn to make better use of it. What I’m learning in just 3 short days of this, is that because I know I’m going to write down what I’m doing, I am already more focused on how I spend my time! I made an effort between 7am and 2pm to get in 1000 steps each hour. Now mind you I have no treadmill and did not leave my house, so this meant a lot of laps around my house, but hey I got it done! And at the end of the day went above my current step goal of 8000 per day. I know the goal should be 10k, but honestly I struggle to get over 3500, so right now just maintaining a daily goal of 8k is what I’m shooting for! I worked my Plexus business and I managed to finally take the time to call the dentist and eye doctor for appointments that were needed. I vacuumed my house again, mopped my wood floors and made some minor changes at the entry way that I’d been really wanting to get done. I also finished reading my Rachel Hollis book. I did all of this by 2pm and went to take a nap, because I was on-call last night. When the word came that I was not going to have to go to work I did a repeat of Monday night; made a nice dinner, enjoyed a movie and then went to bed with my husband. And guess what? I again slept 6 hours and managed to stay in the bed all night long! I also feel like I need to give a shout out to my friend Jan for this success in sleeping. She finally convinced me to get an essential oil diffuser for my room and I faithfully diffuse Cedarwood and Lavender every time I lay down, even if it’s just for a nap. It has become a life saver, and I know will help again today when I have to go take a nap to prepare for work tonight! Needless to say when I laid my head down last night to rest I felt great, I felt rested, I felt accomplished, I felt positive, there was no sadness in sight. Then today came. I am not sad this morning, not anywhere near where I was on Sunday, but I do not have that same positive attitude I had yesterday either. Today I’m looking at my journal so far and wondering how I’ve already wasted so much precious time. I’m looking at my to do list for the day and thinking “blah, I don’t really feel like doing any of that”, and I’ll be perfectly honest, I didn’t feel like sitting down to write this post. But, and this is key, this is where the things I’m learning are coming into play. For example, I know that my struggles as well as my blessings, help others when shared. Sure some people may care less about what I write, but I truly believe that for some, it’s an inspiration. I can say that because I know how I feel when I read posts by ladies like Rachel Hollis, Jordan Dooley or Lysa TerKeurst. And while I realize that I do not have near the notoriety they do, I do know this, they used to not have it either. I know that Rachel got shot down and discouraged numerous times, but she kept going, because she knew she had something to offer, and look at her now. So I pushed myself to get those 1000 steps in the 7am hour, I filled up my water bottle already, and I sat my butt down with my laptop instead of turning on my roku. My plan after I publish this is to start on that gigantic book that is on my end table. And for my drive in to work today I am determined to turn on a podcast. I’ve been telling myself that for weeks and by the time I get in the car I’m usually grumpy and don’t feel like it, today I’m going to do it, because I know that the encouraging words I will hear will make me happier. Sometimes ladies it really is just all up to you. You can choose to wallow in whatever it is that is making you unhappy, or you can push yourself even when you don’t want to, and do the things that you know help you. Believe me, I’d love to just curl up with my blanket, a cup of coffee, a good show on TV and do nothing else but be lazy and sleep until I have to go to work. But I know that will make me feel bad, I know it will send my emotions to a bad place, I know it will make staying awake all night worse. So I’m not, I’m determined, I don’t feel like it, but I’m forcing myself to be determined, to get my water and my steps in, to feed my soul today. Because I’m learning that I can just keep swimming, but if I don’t change my behaviors then I won’t feel any differently and eventually I will get tired of swimming and drown. Please set a goal for yourself today. Just one thing and it doesn’t have to be huge. If you don’t move around a lot, try for 5000 steps. If you don’t drink any water, try to at least have 1 glass for every other glass of something you have. If you don’t normally read or listen to podcasts, today instead of scrolling facebook on your lunch break, try googling Jordan Dooley and check out some of what she has to share. Change your determination and you will change your life. I promise!

~Carla~